Monday, March 21, 2011

I have too many pills in my system.

As stated previously I have too many pills in my system right now. Not bad pills, I'm not that kind of girl. But this morning I took my bc pill, for obvious reasons. I took a few pills for the headache I had all last night into the morning and then I took half a diet pill. You know I wanted to lose weight for my trip and well its right here. Eleven days and I will be somewhere else, doing someone else and now I'm reality starting to wonder why I'm even going.

It seemed like a good reason at first but now, I'm just not sure. I really don't want to go, but then that us me and how I do things. The closer things get, the more all I want to do is nothing. I do not like being out of my comfort zone at all, and this trip is seriously out of my comfort zone. I'll be facing so many elements that I feel like I'm on overload.
Not having a plan...the unknown
Performance anxiety
Worry (so much falls under this one word).

Overall even though I don't want to go, I'm going. I have to learn how to go out and face my fears, and in doing so it will help shape me as a person. I wonder if there is a pill for that?
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